Do you have them?
Do you know about them?
Thoughts on them?
Learning to set and enforce boundaries has been a bigggg part of my journey - and it was actually in the conversation where I learned I was an empath that the therapist asked me if I had them. I said no and she sent me home with a bundle of worksheets to begin implementing. The process seemed simple: decide what you do and do not want to experience and communicate it with those your decision will impact. But when I got out into the real world and began practicing what the worksheets were saying I realized very quickly that setting boundaries wasn’t easy.
Because boundaries require a hard no.
A line in the sand.
A decision on what I will and will not stand.
It’s a black and white process.
But I see the world as colourful.
I see why boundaries are important, but also why they put up walls or leave people out.
And I don’t like that.
I like to be accommodating. I don’t want to be mean. I’m filled with reasons for believing others have the best intentions and I don’t need protecting. But as I’ve learned, a yes to someone else is often a no to ourselves, especially when we are prone to over-giving. And that’s an important thing for those of us aware of having a calling to realize if we are to fulfill our mission.
Without them, we spend our days bending over backwards to meet people and their needs.
Or in relationships that aren’t fulfilling.
Because we like helping.
We can see the potential in something.