An Antidote to Creative Burnout
When I’m writing this, it’s been three months since I launched my new YouTube channel, and because I know many of the readers in this space are also creators, I thought it would be fun to share a few things I’ve learned and embraced as I imperfectly stumbled along this new path.
1 — I’ve prioritized play.
So much of my creative career has focused on what is ‘smart’ or profitable. Profit is important, yes, but I knew that this new beginning needed to have a different energy. I went through a major creative rut (a moult) and I kept myself stuck by pressuring myself to ‘get it right’ when it came to my next steps. The moment I decided to just start sharing what I found joyful, was the moment stress melted away and I was actually able to create something. Since having kids, I think a lot about how you wouldn’t ask a baby to pay your bills, or more poetically - a seedling to provide you shade - so why would you do that to your creative projects that are only in their beginning stages? Right now the only job my YouTube channel has is to play, grow and learn a bit more each day, and it’s my hope, that as the channel grows and becomes monetized that its strong inner child playfulness stays intact. Which, like a child, requires I prioritize play and make joy a habit, starting now, from its very first steps.
2 — I embraced help.
I started my YouTube channel after stepping away from the online world, where my computer sat dormant for over a year. Even though I wanted to start a YouTube channel, I was afraid to actually show up due to some very real digital trauma from the 2020-2022 years. Knowing this, I knew I needed help. The heaviest block was a physical one — my body (nervous system) was deeply resistant to coming back online and creating digitally again, and because of that was very good at self-sabotage. My particular self-sabotage was exhaustion, so I asked my partner to help me remove the barriers to entry, like setting up my camera, lighting, and even doing the majority of the first edit.
In the past, I would have tried to power through by myself, but something about becoming a mom, and the vulnerability in motherhood, has helped to humble the part of me that believes needing support means being weak or incapable. Sometimes, we all need a little help to push ourselves forward.
3 — I let myself be a failure.
Similar to #1, I realized that the only way to out of a rut was to play more than I ever had before, which meant I needed to embrace an identity of someone who threw spaghetti at the wall, and was proud of her failures. Part of how I did this was by choosing, very consciously, to leave my failures in the videos - to not even try to perform any sense of perfection. There was a night when I realized that instead of my views going up, they were plummeting down and honestly, it didn’t phase me at all. Because I was proud of the work I had done. There is something very freeing that happens when you decide to not take your failures personally, by not trying to be so perfect. To say, ya, I failed. So what? Isn’t that what creativity is? Being curious? Resourceful? Trying things just because? Letting your life be one big experiment? To fail is to be creative, and the artist in me is proud of that. To “fail” is to say, I tried something, this is how it turned out, and now I get to choose what to do with the data I’ve collected. That’s it. Nothing more.
4 - A learn fast attitude.
Instead of waiting to be perfect, I challenged myself to learn something new with each upload. Instead of ditching my first videos because they had bad audio, I decided to upload them and learn the lesson of how important it is to have the right mic. Instead of reshooting footage where I was wearing dark clothing that made the video feel dull and withdrawn, I decided to upload the video and learn the lesson that clothing matters, and lighter colours do better in certain lighting. I didn’t see those moments as failures - I saw them as huge success, because I was learning something and getting better every time I pressed publish.
5 - One year non-negotiable.
When I decided to start a YouTube channel, I decided that I was going to create videos for one year, and then decide my next moves. This was non-negotiable, so while there were times where I thought, “I’m just not cut out for this”, or “this is too hard on our family”, or “who do I think I am starting a YouTube channel?”, I didn’t have the option to quit. The only option was to keep picking myself up and taking small actions everyday to keep filming and uploading, because that’s the decision I made. Too often we give ourselves the convenience of quitting, but what if you didn’t? What would you create if you just couldn’t quit? For me it’s become a practice of devotion, of stick-to-it-ness. Of showing up every day, no matter what, because my dreams and my goals are important.
Next steps
I’m still new to YouTube, I’m only a few months in. But it’s amazing to think about how far I’ve come since my first video. I know a lot more about filming and editing and how YouTube works. Just looking behind the curtain at the YouTube Creator Studio has been really cool! That said, I’m also looking forward to the next three months, and how I’d like to improve. I want to learn more about the technical side of my cameras - to shoot more manual. I also want to deep dive into lightning because that’s been a weaker area for me, especially for on-cams. Most of all, I want to keep showing up, creating from a place of what lights me up, and connecting with others along the way.
What creative first steps have you been taking?
P.S. I’m also pouring this same spirit of slow growth, play, and community into something very special: my new membership platform, Tended, launching on August 8th! If you're craving a nurturing space for your own creative roots, I'd love for you to join us.