If you've heard about the law of attraction and the ability we all have to draw in what we desire, I can bet you've also heard about the importance of keeping your thoughts, feelings, beliefs, and actions as positive as possible.
And while I'm all for feeling gratitude for this world we live in, as someone who can't help but be affected by our world, who also has a tendency to pick up on subtle energies and be bulldozed by another's negative feelings when not on my game, I've had to think critically about what it means to keep a high vibration. As someone who's here to feel the negativity of the world, I've had to get creative in how I can feel down and still use the law of attraction in my favour.
Since I'm not the only sensitive person with big dreams who is using the law of attraction to intentionally create their reality, I thought I'd share some of my critical thinking with you. So you too can align your energy, keep your vibration high and become all you have hopes to be!
Because I want that for you, and me, and all of us out here leading with our hearts because I know whatever it is you are wanting to manifest is something that's going to have a positive affect on this world and those living it in.
So let's get to it!
I'm conscious of the story I tell myself about negative feelings.
The stories we tell ourselves are everything.
In the therapeutic world we call this a 'narrative' and there are folks trained in narrative therapies/techniques to assist people in becoming aware of their stories so they can reclaim their narrative and tell a different one. Stories are also important in the self-help world and the conversation on energy because it's the beliefs we have about our stories that determine what we manifest. Stories then, either propel us forward or hold us back.
For most of my life I've understood my down times as bad, and myself flawed for having them. But what if feeling down wasn't bad? What if feeling down served a purpose? What if being able to feel low was a gift? All these 'what ifs' are possible with a shift in story. I've trained myself to change the mindset I have about feeling low; instead of feeling guilty or shameful for feeling down when I "should" be happier, more productive (and all those other things our neoliberal world has trained me to believe as successful) I now understand my lows as a moment in time to rest or redirect - or in many cases, a moment when I am in-tune and aware of the realities of this world so I can show up and do something different. Changing my story around feeling low has changed the vibration my lows give off. I can be low and still be in a high vibration BECAUSE feeling low now emits a frequency of gratitude and acceptance, a feeling with a much higher vibration than guilt, lack or shame.
Action: Take time to write out the story you tell yourself about 'feeling low' and then challenge yourself to find five reasons why feeling low is a good thing. Start changing your story by changing the story you tell about your experiences.
I remember the big picture involves a committment to the small steps.
When I wrote an article on feeling overwhelmed a few weeks ago I was actively carrying myself through the process of taking small steps to increase my vibration and re-align with the life I desire. I was overwhelmed thinking about everything I want to do with my life; if you want context, it was a few days before I wrote about the law of attraction and why the people in greatest need of law of attraction support can't pay for it because they are living the result of our systems set up to keep them powerless. And thinking about it made ME feel powerless - so I got low.
My natural tendency is to see/feel/know the big picture. The world peace, the equality, the game-changing shifts in perspectives and potential. The thing with being a 'big picture' person though, is that I often forget it's the small steps that make the big steps possible. Energy, like emotions, exists along a spectrum and in order to move myself from a space of feeling powerless to feeling powerful (so I can do all those big things I dream of) I need to build energetic momentum.
This takes intentional action on the seemingly small things; like pouring a glass of water, getting out for a walk in nature and brushing my hair. Drinking water gives me momentum to go for a walk which gives me momentum brush my hair. Brushing my hair grounds me enough to sit at my computer, which gives me momentum to write. Writing inspires others who with their own skill-sets and personalities use their inspiration to inspire even more people. Water then, is an important part of world peace, even though my brain doesn't naturally understand the logic.
When we feel low, a higher frequency is always just one small action away but as anyone who knows lows knows, one small action can feel like climbing Mount Everest. This is why it's important we gently encourage ourselves to commit to the small steps even when we don't want anything to do with them.
Action: Ask yourself what makes you feel good. Or even a little better. What action does your mental and physical health thrive on? Is it going to the gym? Calling a friend? Acknowledge that action and then reflect on the steps you need to take to make that action possible.
I now know I have "people" - and I now know where to find them.
Feeling validated and knowing you aren't alone is more powerful than any anti-depressant. This is why I love the Internet and how it has created a space where people can collect in communities to validate each other's experience.
I adore my time with my thoughts and until the past few years I didn't understand all the hype around needing friends - ha! 'Having friends' exhausted me and more often than not I left my friend interactions feeling guilty for being who I am. This changed when I met my social work girls. I called them in with the law of attraction and have never felt more encouraged to be myself. Though we now live miles apart, just hearing their voices on the phone brings me to happy tears. They get me and being 'gotten' has been life changing.
Most sensitive people have never really fit it. We are intuitive so we are good at shifting to circumstance but 'i-kind-of-sort-of-fit-in-if-I-change-myself-enough and truly fitting in are two completely different things. Knowing where your people gather and knowing how to access them when feeling low is one of the most important things to remember when wanting to raise your vibration. The people you resonate with have an energy that already gets you - or understands where you want to go - and being around that energy when you feel low helps you balance back out without you having to do anything more than say hello.
* This is also why it's really important to be in the energy of the people you are inspired by. They have the light codes / a specific frequency you need to feel understood and / or level up. Read their books, listen to their music, scroll their social media accounts and never feel jealous because you resonate with them because your inner being recognizes that they have what you can have too.
I remember that being in alignment is more important than being positive.
There is a misconception that high vibration is doing "happy" things, but for most sensitive people the things our culture associates with happiness can oftentimes feel shallow... which actually lowers our vibration because we NEED depth. Most sensitive people like to talk about the big things; the injustice, the systems, the shit going on in this world, and those topics aren't happy nor positive. They are in alignment though, and that's what matters. My vibration is much lower when I'm having to small talk or talk about things that feel superficial than it is when I get to dive into a deep conversation with someone who gets it. This is one of the reasons I'm so drawn to rap music when I feel low. Most genuine rap artists have come through oppression to find their success and I resonate with the depth of their stories.
Action: Take note of where you feel the best; this is resonance. Have a list of things that resonate somewhere nearby so you can access it when needed. It doesn't matter what's on the list and it doesn't matter if it's considered 'high vibe' or 'positive' - it only matters that it resonates with YOU.
I assess where my energy resides in my body and I am mindful of balancing it out.
Chances are, if you've been in this self-help world for any length of time, you've heard about the chakras, the energy centers in our body that govern our physical experience and dictate our reality. The most common understanding of the chakra system encompasses 7 chakra points - the root chakra through the crown chakra - although more in-depth understandings extend the system much further.
In the 7-point system, when we say we are grounded we are talking about being in the lower three chakras - the root, sacral, solar plexus - and when we talk about being more closely tied with our Higher selves, our intuition and our guides, we are talking about being in the upper chakras - the heart, throat, third eye, crown.
Because the lower chakras are associated with physical reality and oftentimes the "ego", there is an understanding that to exist at a higher vibration we need to raise up out of them and into our higher chakras. But this isn't always the case. When I write I move my energy up into my higher chakras to be able to connect with my guidance and hold compassionate space, and this leaves me feeling awful after a while. There are times when I leave a call and have to physically push myself onto the ground just to breathe! That feeling is not comfortable and though I'm in my higher vibrational chakras, the discomfort I feel is not a high vibration AT ALL.
The same is true for my lower chakras. There are times when being in my lower chakras (think: anything to do with fulfilling my earthly needs like being relational, making money, day-to-day tasks, etc.) is what I need but there are also times when it feels heavy and I need to move back up into higher energies. Knowing when my energy is too much in my higher chakras and being able to bring it down or recognizing when my energy is too much in my lower chakras and being able to bring it back up has been my secret weapon in keeping my overall vibration high.
Some people feel more comfortable in their higher chakras, but I'm a real-world person and just can't do it. If you're drawn to my work you probably can't either.
I know it's usually the thing I'm most resistant to that is the thing I'm most in need of doing.
Last summer I was unemployed after graduation; I couldn't find a job and I felt pretty low because I thought I was a failure. [In hindsight, I'm so grateful for that time because it opened space for me to start this blog! Proof that there is always a much bigger plan at play.] I was applying to jobs and not hearing back and feeling pretty limited living with my parent's [side note, my parents are amazing and I'm so grateful they took me in.]
After a few weeks of feeling shitty I started getting the hint that I needed to Tap around the idea of success. An image of me Tapping floated through my mind constantly. This was the non-physical giving me what I needed to move from where I was to where I was asking to go, but I resisted. I knew Tapping worked, I knew I had limiting beliefs holding me back, but I just couldn't motivate myself to take the 5-10 minutes to practice it. I finally had enough [I encourage you to read this post if you want to know more about that AH-HA moment and how you can have one too!] and decided to lean into the resistance and just do it. The next day I woke up to a job offer and a few days later stumbled across my perfect little apartment.
Us humans are hardwired for compliancy. Though we want success, we will do whatever we can to sabotage it because we have really strong core beliefs that we aren't worth it. I'd get into theories on why that is [hint: a compliant society is a malleable society] but I'll let you find your way down that rabbit hole when you're ready.
When I'm feeling low and want to increase my vibration and get myself to my next level, I remember that story about Tapping and take note of what it is I'm actively resisting.
Action: If you've been wanting to move through a plateau or you're simply feeling really low with an intention to feel better, what guidance have you received? And more importantly, how are you resisting that guidance?
Have you ever thought about any of these?
Or about your place as a sensitive person in the law of attraction conversation in general? Though there is a lot of great advice out there surrounding intentional living and how to maintain a high vibration, we have to remember that staying critical / creative thinkers is more powerful than any bit of law of attraction advice another can provide.
I can be low and still exist at a high vibration and manifest all I desire. I hope you know you can too!
P.S. Some of you have been telling me you've been feeling extra sensitive lately. If I could give one piece of advice it's that you read my post on clearing, grounding and shielding your energy and commit to doing it at least once a day. Energies are subtle and though you may not feel an immediate need to look after yours, you WILL feel a huge shift if you make clearing, grounding and shielding a priority.